I read so many poems on almost relationships and half baked ones. Ones where there’s only one person fighting for this relationship. When looking at these ‘relationships’ from the outside it’s so easy to judge and wonder WHY IS SHE PUTTING UP WITH THIS?!
Unfortunately, things are never so easily black and white. We come up with all these reasons for why he can’t commit, and of course he has to love me otherwise he would be able to let me go, otherwise he wouldn’t keep taking me out on dates, otherwise we wouldn’t be intimate, the list goes on and on.
We really can’t make ourselves see the truth that he only likes the attention and we’re convient.
I had a friend in college and we bonded over the guys that were half in and half out in our lives. There were different ways in which they did this and for what ended up being different reasons. Eventually, her Stubborn became fully committed and they’re now in a long term, loving relationship.
Sometimes you break things off with your Stubborn and spend time apart. Months or years later you may reconnect and he realized who and what’s important in his life. And you two also end up in a long term, loving relationship.
Its stories like these that keep us running along to each precious breadcrumb they feel like dropping. I’ve been preaching that the answer is to always ditch the guy and find someone who knows how special you are from the start.
I preach that answer because the last option is that you got my Stubborn and you broke things off and finally found a partner who would do anything to show how much they love you and want you in their lives. A partner who is the complete opposite of what you’ve been putting up with in the past and one who makes you realize just how delusional you were for ever thinking that your Stubborn ever really liked/loved you.
But as I think about success stories, is it time I realize that maybe I’m just bitter? That my story didn’t work out the same way and I got burned in the end. Am I preventing others from their happy ends by telling them to call it quits? Or am I giving them a warning against an unhealthy relationship?
I always warned my friend against her Stubborn just like she did with me. And I think I would do it all over again even though it never stopped either of us.
You want the best for your friends and you know they’re so great so you automatically dislike anyone who doesn’t see exactly what you see. And that makes me bitter.
So yes I am bitter. Bitter against all Stubborns for not appreciating what they have when they have it. Bitter that there was ever someone in my friend’s life that had her doubting her self worth.