December and Christmas Playlists

December: Forever Love

Cheryl Lynn and Luther Vandross’ If this World were Mine from 1998 lists all of Mother Nature’s treasures and gifting them to your love. Listen here

Whitney Houston’s I Will Always Love You from 1992 is a song of a Love that will last forever even though the couple does not. Some love never dies. Listen here

Etta James’ At Last from 1960 is a song that holds up to the test of time when loneliness is finally replaced by Love. Listen here

John legend’s All of Me from 2013 displays a realistic love that flourishes even with it’s imperfections. Listen here

Luke Combs’ Forever at Last from is a song where Life can take its toll on you but a deep love will always hold you through. Listen here

Bonus: Christmas Playlist

Elvis Presley’s Blue Christmas from is a song focused on the importance of being with your loved ones for Christmas. It doesn’t matter where you are, but who you’re with. Listen here

Michael Buble’s Holly Jolly Christmas from 2011 is a must have on this Christmas Playlist and you can’t go wrong with any song from his Christmas album. You can’t have Christmas without Michael Buble! Listen here

Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas is You from 1994 might be a song you hate to love but let’s face it, it’s a total bop! She doesn’t want any material gifts, just her lover. Listen here

Husband and Wife duo Elmo and Patsy’s Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer from 1979 is an odd choice I’m sure, but it reminds me of my childhood and Christmas is all things Jolly so it’s making the list. Listen here

Wham!’s Last Christmas from 1986 is a song of trying not to be someone’s fool yet again. Listen here

Wedding Day

Your snoring lulls me to sleep after a hard day

cradling me sweetly in the night.

And your immovable love gives me strength 

like a constant steady flow of a river to my heart.

 

Your laughter breaths life back into me, babe

Fills my lungs so full, I think my feet might leave the ground.

Your tender love wraps around me like armor.

There’s nothing I can’t do with you next to me.

 

You’re such an important part of me

Your love is in the air I breath.

It radiates off the skin I touch.

I feel your love in every kiss

Every touch

Every word.

And I hear it today in, “I do”.

 

-August 22, 2020

Digital Love Language

Some of us may be familiar with the 5 love languages but I thought with this modern dating era, there might be a second layer.

 

Constant Texting

Some people want that constant connection and interaction. They want to talk about their day, about events with friends, and random childhood memories. They want to learn everything about you, every detail and corner of your mind. These couples place high value on long notes detailing how much you love them and being the first thing you think of when you wake up. 

 

Facetime  

You don’t need the constant communication but when you do communicate you want it to have more quality. You want to vent and tell stories to each other with full animation and all the tea. Some couples just feel more connected by being in the same environment together and not necessarily talking. You want to see that smile, hear that laugh, and see their face light up when talking about their day

 

Sending Memes

These individuals may have a hard time expressing how they feel in their own words so they use art and published words to tell someone how they’re feeling. This is an easy, maybe passive way of keeping a connection which can be good for when you have a crush on someone. It also works well in long term relationship as a simple way to show that they’re thinking about you throughout the day. This is a way to make your partner laugh or communicate the type of mood you’re in.

 

Social Media  

They need everyone to know just how much they love you! They’re so proud of all your accomplishments, they’ll have a picture and paragraph for every one. Their social media followers will know of every good deed you’ve done from cooking dinner to trips to the beach. They may also know about every fight or embarrassing act you’ve done as well though. For better or worse, their followers have front row seats to your relationship.

 

Like the Way I Do

Just the other night

You asked me why I was here?

I asked if you wanted me to leave

You couldn’t look me in the eye when you asked next

how I could love someone like you.

Well baby, you have me just a little bit confused

because if you saw yourself like the way I do

then you would have no problem believing me like you should.

 

Truth is my heart soars every time you say I love you

I can’t help but feel weak every time you look at me

Darling, it’s the way our bodies melt into one when you hold me

The passion that always controls me whenever our lips touch.

 

-2010

 

With Every Part of me, I Love You

I have a hard time taking ownership of my love

Always leaving off the “I”s of my “Love You”s.

I hope I’m saying enough

To show you my love and appreciation

With my lips and fingertips.

My legs and heart.

Soul and tongue.

Mind and eyes.

With every part of me.

 

-September 2018+

 

What a Long Term Relationship has Taught Me

Prior to my current relationship I had only ever reached the early stages of dating. It was still a time to look and act your best as you still wanted to impress your date and win them over. As my relationship reaches its first year mark, I reflect back on the changes I’ve noticed when a relationship becomes long term.

People Stay

Since this is my first long term relationship, the biggest lesson has been that people do stay. I’ve never been in a relationship that stayed together after a fight. The first sign of trouble meant it was time to pack your bags. So i’ve wanted to avoid issues out of fear that it would make my boyfriend want to leave or that the fear of getting hurt would make me run away. Now even while in the mix of a disagreement, I’m thinking about the future past the current issue .

Comfort level

First is that you don’t always have to look your best. It’s the no makeup and freshly washed damp hair, it’s the double chin while laying in bed watching t.v., it’s the silent farts that don’t slip out so silent. You can relax and be yourself and also appreciate your partner feeling comfort enough to be vulnerable in the same way.   

Security

Having someone consistently in your life for a few months, you learn to count on them to be there for you. Knowing the fresh puppy love has worn off and that you will have bad days but you are still loved. Everyday won’t be great and you’ll probably ugly cry because you burnt the pancakes but now there’s someone there to help you make the next batch.

Trust

You trust them to show very vulnerable parts of yourself to them and know that they will hold you through the tears. I have also finally learned that issues and disagreements don’t have to be a threat to the relationship. That they are things to work on and grow from and not a reason for leaving.

Communication

You’re probably never communicating enough. So often i make assumptions because I’m afraid i won’t like the actual answer. But my own thoughts and worries hurt just the same and probably make it out to be worse than it is. It’s better to communicate how you’re feeling as soon as possible before your mind makes you crazy. There should even be conversations about how to best communicate. Defining the best time of day when you’re both open minded and phrases that aren’t in an attacking manner will be so helpful in future discussions.

Self Improvement

It’s made me come face to face with my own issues that I had been able to ignore when they weren’t really affecting anyone else. Since all of my dating history is short, failed relationships – I didn’t trust that this relationship would last past a couple of months. After the fourth guy leaves, your self esteem is bound to take a dip no matter who you are. So I had a lack of trust and self esteem and even added on jealousy for good measure. None of these are healthy for a relationship and my boyfriend hadn’t done anything to make me doubt him and that is also unfair. He shouldn’t have to pay for my ex’s mistakes. Over the months, I’ve made sure to communicate with my boyfriend when I’m struggling with one of these issues so he can help me help myself. I’ve also educated myself on ways to deal with these issues in a healthy manner and have enlisted help from others to better myself.

Then to Now

I can’t believe

That the months have gone by

And the passion still rages

Like our first week together.

The electric jitters have been replaced

With knowing stares and secret smiles.

Second date or 522nd your hand

still falls on my lap in the car.

So many firsts have been shared

But my love for you still feels brand new

Still sad when I leave your place

Because I can never spend enough time with you

I love you’s used to get stuck in the back of my throat

Now they’re tumbling out of my mouth like salmon swimming upstream.

I thought these feelings might have settled by now

But this beating in my chest is and always will be for you.

 

-June

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